Porto’s crack-like chocolate croissant and too-pretty-to-eat red velvet

In no particular order, here’s my Top 10 Best Los Angeles Eastside Sweet Eats & Desserts. Loosen those pants and stow that New Year’s resolution — you’ve got almost 2 weeks left and there isn’t a Splenda packet for miles on this list!

1) Porto’s chocolate croissant & red velvet cupcake: With flaky, buttery croissants that would make the French green with envy, the cherry on top is the generous chocolate filling. Equally intoxicating is the almost too-pretty-to-eat red velvet cupcake. Crowned with a single rose petal, you know you’re in for a treat before the first bite. Porto’s, 315 N Brand Blvd., Glendale, (818) 956-5996

Grandma-quality sweet treats at Monterey Park’s NBC

2) NBC’s zi ma wu & tofu fa: My grandmother used to slave away every Christmas making this ancient recipe for the fam. Now you can get grandma-quality sweet sesame soup (zi ma wu) and sweet silken tofu (tofu fa) every weekend at this MPK institution. NBC, 404 S. Atlantic Blvd., Monterey Park, (626) 282-2323

Mexican atole or hot chocolate, your choice, only 300 calories!

3) King Taco’s decadent atole: At 300 calories a cup, you better believe this Mexican masa and cornstarch based hot toddy is worth it. It’s like a sweet tamale in a cup with a satiny smooth texture in strawberry, maple, coconut and vanilla. King Taco, 2400 E. Cesar Chavez Ave., Los Angeles, (323) 264-3940

4) Mexican hot chocolate from CaCao Mexicatessen: At another 300 calories a cup, this traditional holiday treat comes infused with cinnamon, whipped cream, toasted almonds, a full Abuelita chocolate disk and love. CaCao Mexicatessen, 1576 Colorado Blvd., Los Angeles, (323) 478-2791

Colorado Donuts’ jubilant mound of happiness

5) Rainbow sprinkle donut from Colorado Donuts: I’m a rainbow sprinkle connoisseur – this one is the best I’ve ever had – freshly made every few hours! Colorado Donuts, 1578 Colorado Blvd., Los Angeles, 90041, 323-340-1962

Jaiho! Decadent jalebi and rasmalai in Atwater Village

6) India Sweets’ rasmalai & jalebi: Like a melt-in-your-mouth churro, fresh-from-the-fryer jalebi is a taste to behold. Ditto on the squishy, cottage-cheese based rasmalai with rose-water syrup accents. India Sweets & Spices, 3126 Los Feliz Blvd., Los Angeles, (323) 345-0360

Shaved ice and sugar balls at MPK’s Shau May

7) Taiwanese slush from Shau May in MPK: Greatest post-Chinese meal dessert. Your choice of 3 toppings ranging from boba to sweet oatmeal, a mountain of finely shaved ice topped with sugar water and condensed milk. Delish! Shau May, 104 N. Garfield Ave., Monterey Park, 626-571-2727

Olive oil ice cream with sea salt caramel and warm waffle cone triangles

8) Maximiliano’s olive oil ice cream with sea salt caramel: How can something so incredibly wrong be so right? Infused with the smell, rich flavor and savoriness of olive oil, this signature dessert is the only reason I keep going back. Maximiliano, 5930 York Ave., Los Angeles, (323) 739-6125

Perhaps the best pineapple bun and sweet rice cake in L.A.

9) Pineapple bun & friends from Family Pastry in Chinatown: Three generations of Hong Kong Chinese can’t be wrong! These are the best pineapple buns anywhere. The sweet rice cakes and pork dumplings are pretty damn good too. Family Pastry, 715 N. Spring St., Los Angeles, 213-622-5255

Panos’ addicting cheese-based dumplings of joy

10) Panos’ halwat el-jebne: Be careful, these harmless little guys are crack-laced morsels of heaven. Halwat el-jebne is the perfect union of sweet, squishy and supple. Don’t forget to dunk those babies in the rose water syrup. Panos Pastry, 5150 Hollywood Blvd., Los Angeles, 90027, (323) 661-0335